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hope
Contributed by
Vermillion
on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 12:38:44 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Hope
cemetery boy
here lies your life
buried face down,upside down with no last rites
we are the damned
and behold our fate
unwanted before we even pass thru our mothers gate
i pass thru her birth canal
and i hear the sounds
solemn sounds that fill my mind with fear
"Abandon all hope,ye who enter here"
cemetery child
gaze upon the stone
look at your corpse and realize you're not alone
we are the battered
children left to rot
fighting a fight that cant be fought
children who become doctors
assassins who kill the doctors
who kill the babies who would be the doctor....
those who are pre-born are gods children
those who are pre-school are society's problem
to be born to be drafted to die in a war
we are all children to the oily green machine whore
urban assault is our lullabies
72 virgins get their wings when a hebrew dies
sub machine guns under our desk
ignore independent thought,teacher knows best
stripped of our individuality in the schools
to graduate and be the high honored,straight A fool
brain washed in our churches,jesus christ the crutch
afraid to give into our god given emotions like pride and lust
stay inside,lock your doors and fear the dark
sleep with one eye open and keep your cross hairs on your mark
brainwashed to get rich doing what you hate
brainwashed to accept the fact that this is fate
brainwashed to pretend that you really care
brainwashed to fear what isnt really there
brainwashed to be a pawn in this pointless game
brainwashed to raise your children to do the very same...
cemetery man
with that rope around your throat
read your tombstone "here lies Hope"
Copyright ©
Vermillion
... [
2005-07-24 00:38:44]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by feathercut on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 01:36:17 AM AEST
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| death is not murderous... and that our safety lye at itdoes not damn our life, but leave its purpose to rest in our own hands... nice write but there is much much more hope |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by veenu on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 01:58:20 AM AEST
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| with love thats nice poem true and eternal |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by Whisper on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 03:30:05 AM AEST
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Wow that was pretty heavy . Those words you used are powerful and descriptive .As you read you can feel the feeling of hopelessness. Its like you said in the line "Brainwashed to raise your children to do the very same." I wonder if the next generation is feeling the same thing way about their futures.
Good write it provoked thought in this reader.
Whisper |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by cooley1818 on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 07:00:11 AM AEST
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| i thought this was a very good write, i loved it, you used alot of what u believe in, and i can understand the point you were trying to come across. very good |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 07:14:47 AM AEST
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This was such a hard-hitting write. You’re dark imagery was wonderful; I like how you used your thoughts in this poem. It feels like your sharing a part of you with us. Now that’s just cool.
Jane~ |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 09:44:58 AM AEST
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Ah, there is so much here in between "cemetery boy" and "cemetery man"! For the record, dark poetry is not my first selection usually... but you caught my attention with your opening stanza ('cemetery boy' - is just fabulous!) and held it straight through.
As I said, there is much here... some extraordinary lines, vivid images, crystal clear expression. Something in this speaks to me... and your point is not lost on this reader. Well done!
Refusing, however, to heed the direction given in your author's note,
~Snemmy |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kayden on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 05:30:53 PM AEST
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This is a deep poem. I wish I could Wright like that.
-Jimmy |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by seci on
Monday, 25th July 2005 @ 02:08:42 AM AEST
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| there is nothing much to say but Damn i love this poem. i love it. I REALLY REALLY DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. |
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Re: hope
(User Rating: 1 )
by assassinatorgirl on
Tuesday, 29th November 2005 @ 05:36:23 PM AEST
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beautiful, deep, and full of so much truth. society is so like that, it's refreshing seeing someone acknowledge that. i only hope that the few who aren't so, can rise above the rest adn set examples.
you write so well i wish i could write like that. i wrote better when i was depressed, lol. |
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