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The Rescue
Contributed by
LolaWhite
on
Thursday, 21st July 2005 @ 06:01:33 PM in AEST
Topic:
Haiku
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Fighting for a breath
You are there to rescue me
Oh how I love you
Copyright ©
LolaWhite
... [
2005-07-21 18:01:33]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Rescue
(User Rating: 1 )
by vibes2go on
Thursday, 21st July 2005 @ 06:34:28 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Normally, a haiku is about nature and the 1st line sets out whether you're in autumn or winter or what have you .. but since you did 5/7/5 ... I'll let you slide ..LOL .. nobody sticks to the strict rules anyway... and it's great you wanted to try something different. Great!! :-) |
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Re: The Rescue
(User Rating: 1 )
by sride686 on
Thursday, 21st July 2005 @ 08:22:00 PM AEST
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| Well this was a good write because the structure was good. I’ve never tried to do a Haiku so your one up on me there. I like what BlueGusto said because he gave you criticism but then said that it was good because it is your art so it can be however you want it. It did have a good strong message in it. Take care my love….Steve |
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Re: The Rescue
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 22nd July 2005 @ 01:31:42 AM AEST
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a very strong statment said in a most delicate fashion very genuine . . .
Ben |
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Re: The Rescue
(User Rating: 1 )
by hardrocker15198916 on
Saturday, 23rd July 2005 @ 11:35:32 PM AEST
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a Message)
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ilike this haiku its a good one
I can relate to it. |
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