|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Dark Water
Contributed by
LolaWhite
on
Sunday, 17th July 2005 @ 05:16:43 PM in AEST
Topic:
selfstruggles
|
A dark water engulfed his soul
For how long we may never know
He wanted desperatly to keep above the wave
He never wanted to be it's slave
The wave came down and he choked it in
Sweet like candy
A deadly sin
The tide goes out and the tide comes in
And now we start all over again
Copyright ©
LolaWhite
... [
2005-07-17 17:16:43]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Dark Water
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 17th July 2005 @ 06:00:31 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
thats an awesome poem:) you are very talented! 10/10 great work:), could you please comment on some of my poems? I would really appreciate it ill comment on more of yours...thanks:)
-Steph |
|
|
Re: Dark Water
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Sunday, 17th July 2005 @ 06:22:16 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
huge volumes in few precise words nicely done
Michelle |
|
|
Re: Dark Water
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Sunday, 17th July 2005 @ 08:30:15 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Some good expression in this write...I enjoyed reading it. Nice job. Welcome to YPDC btw!
Scorp. |
|
|
Re: Dark Water
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 18th July 2005 @ 12:57:51 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Scary ain't it? life like a rip tide with it's plenty of distractons, sad theme but lovely poem, well done . . .
Ben |
|
|
Re: Dark Water
(User Rating: 1 )
by sride686 on
Monday, 18th July 2005 @ 09:36:12 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| A good write with a sadness lost in side. Dark water what a great analogy to the sin and pain of life. Very well written but I think all you work up to this point has been good. This poem was sad but the ending brought joy to it. Pain from being lost but then found his way and still has a chance to start again. Very well done and it sounds like this guy is lucky to have a second chance at the mess he made. Take care and keep up the writes my and I will always continue to read….Steve |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
