|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
Cornie
Contributed by
zenaprincess
on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 12:07:38 PM in AEST
Topic:
goodbyepoetry
|
Your blue eyes
They haunt me
From photos
They lie
That smile
Once charming
Now chilling
And dry
Your fingers
Once woven
Around
In my hand
Now clutch at
My heart
Their grip
Is the end
They say silence
Is golden
But that's
Not the case
Your silence
It fills me
With dread
And with hate
The good times
Are gone now
The light
Is now dark
My memories
Will linger
Sad times
They will mark
KB
Copyright ©
zenaprincess
... [
2005-07-09 12:07:38] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Cornie
(User Rating: 1 ) by manic_x_pressive on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 01:45:46 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
WOW! This was a good read, dark, yet upbeat. The rhythm was outstanding and it flowed very well. I especially enjoyed the comparison of "then and now". If I may make one constructive suggestion? Punctuation usage would have enhanced this write and accentuated the tempo. |
|
|
Re: Cornie
(User Rating: 1 ) by Janie on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 02:29:32 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Wonderful poem! Your word use was extremely powerful as was the beat of the poem. Keep writing and please comment on my poem "You are EVERYTHING." |
|
|
Re: Cornie
(User Rating: 1 ) by Arden on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 02:47:04 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
i dont think iv ever read a poem with this kind of rhyming in it.
i loved it.
Your blue eyes
They haunt me
From photos
They lie
That smile
Once charming
Now chilling
And dry
just amazng. i cant say much other then that i thought this piece is wonderful.
5/5 well done
-Arden |
|
|
|