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Losing You
Contributed by
MajesticPoet
on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 10:00:51 AM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
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---------_________-------------
Hurt and sorrow feed the screams
Nothing could ever heal this pain
A couple of drags from my last cigarette
Thinking about the things that I regret
What should have been said
What could have been done
From this day forward
I just can move on
Losing you is the hardest
thing I have ever been through
How can I finish
Knowing what I got left to do
People tell me to let it be
The memories I have meen the world to me
Simple things like a smile on your face
Always charish forever and a day
Smell of flowers fill the air
A Tingle in my body
I know you are there
Losing you is the hardest
thing I have ever been through
How can I finish
Knowing what I got left to do
Copyright ©
MajesticPoet
... [
2005-07-09 10:00:51] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Losing You
(User Rating: 1 ) by waos on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 01:14:10 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Awww, yeah, losing people is a really sad thing, good job
putting your feelings into words, and the use of repititon was
good too. Keep it up!
~Kara |
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Re: Losing You
(User Rating: 1 ) by hauntedscorp on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 04:13:57 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Overall I enjoyed this write, and have experienced similar feelings in my past. There were a couple typos..."meen"=mean, "charish"=cherish...Plus the last line in the first stanza I think would've flowed a bit better without "that." A decent, well-expressed poem nonetheless. Keep it up!
Scorp. |
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