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Robber
Contributed by
XxcrossedxX
on
Friday, 8th July 2005 @ 10:19:43 AM in AEST
Topic:
abstract
|
Under the brim,
Close to the rim,
A boundary about to be broken.
Shaking fast,
Moving at last,
The murderer has awoken.
Asleep in her bed,
Not a word to be said,
The theif has taken a token.
Goodnight little one,
My deed is now done,
And with that, the man had spoken.
Copyright ©
XxcrossedxX
... [
2005-07-08 10:19:43] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Robber
(User Rating: 1 ) by hauntedscorp on
Friday, 8th July 2005 @ 10:29:48 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I like this...it has sort of a haunting quality about it. Your expression in this write is really good for so few words...One small typo though...'theif' should be 'thief.' Other than that, well done!
Scorp. |
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Re: Robber
(User Rating: 1 ) by ForeverAlone on
Friday, 8th July 2005 @ 10:33:41 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Another great poem Amanda, different then normal but great none the less
~Clark |
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Re: Robber
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Thursday, 14th July 2005 @ 12:24:31 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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variety shows a reader has reason to be kept in interest of another piece. =] good to see that in this one. |
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