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Transition
Contributed by
hauntedscorp
on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 02:13:56 PM in AEST
Topic:
ambiguous
|
Slip...
inside my soul
vacant eyes embody lies
Come...
sponge off me
soak it up---malnourish
Sneak...
into my dreams
and discover a nightmare
Clutch...
my heart
grab it greedily
Feel...
the life pulsing
at your disposal
Nature or nurture?
(Strictly your choice)
Wrap...
yourself in my arms
embrace a possibility
Take...
my breath away
gasping for air
Hold...
my hand
walk for eternity
Fulfill...
my mind
expand our horizons
Step...
into my shoes
does it feel comfortable?
Copyright ©
hauntedscorp
... [
2005-07-07 14:13:56]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by jyssvw22 on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 02:22:02 PM AEST
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| i am glad you posted this scorp, i like it alot..i think i get it....but im gonna go read it again anyway...nice job..keep it up |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by jyssvw22 on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 02:22:41 PM AEST
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| ok i do get it...lol...nice!~! |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by In_a_while on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 02:56:19 PM AEST
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I love your stuff!! it's so unique and fun to read... i ilike so much:
Wrap...
yourself in my arms
embrace a possibility
very nice and i'm glad as well you decided to post this.. cause it's very good
dwayne |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 02:56:44 PM AEST
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You posted, we gained !!.Certainly there is something truly fascinating at work in your mind.I'm glad you chose to let it out onto the page
Steve |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 03:07:39 PM AEST
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| Good write. I enjoyed how you put it down. Thanks for sharing with us. Peace Laura |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Zeldianus on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 03:27:54 PM AEST
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| Fantastic write! I truly love it! |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dorkfish on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 04:21:16 PM AEST
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| Very unique. I love it Scorp. It's so different and expressive. |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 04:23:01 PM AEST
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ahh...to become one with someone...such a wonderful feeling...i wonder why you werent going to post it..i thought it was great.
wizard |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eternal_Dreamer on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 04:40:22 PM AEST
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And to think that u weren't going to post it? A unique and superb write that captivates the reader into ur thoughts. An outstanding brillant piece of poetry written with such style.
You go girl.
Hugs,
Dreamer |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 05:21:24 PM AEST
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wow, that was an amazing write, thanks for sharing this,...amazing
pix xx |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 11:42:17 PM AEST
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The ones were not sure on always turn
out the best
I like this poem alot
had me sitting back for a good two mins.
Thinking if I got if right burned my noodle
a lil. bit very good write |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 8th July 2005 @ 10:08:42 AM AEST
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A beautiful poem scorp and deffinately a well
placed wisdom, wonder what the respond
will be, ambiguious? maybey, but your stlye
is noticable, and speaks 4 it self, lovely peice
of writting . . .
Ben
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by ForeverAlone on
Friday, 8th July 2005 @ 10:40:17 AM AEST
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Wow, i like it alot actually, thought it is way different then your normal work, but whos to say whats normal, awesome anyways, and dont doubt yourself scorp, cuz thats a great piece of poetry, i love the ending by the way
~Clark |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Friday, 8th July 2005 @ 10:40:39 AM AEST
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Very Creative!
Step....
into my poem
Delight in my words
Clutch....
At my meaning
With such beautiful words
Take....
In my meaning
My poetry sends
I really liked this one Scorp. It allows for such versatility, as you can see I had to try it out.
Well done, very well done
Will
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 05:25:02 AM AEST
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| Scorp, you are a very special person with a special and VERY original special talent. I am so glad you posted this. It is of course great and again, a score of 5+++++++++++++++++++ is not enough. |
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Re: Transition
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 16th July 2005 @ 09:03:37 PM AEST
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An emotional transition, here.
Enigmatic.
"soak it up---malnourish"
This line, captures me most.
It is emotive and painful to read, yet so nourishing to my dry eyes.
There is a crestfallen element within this piece...so delicately expressed.
The concept of "nature vs. nurture" is a rather social ideal...it molds us completely, either or both ways. Thought provoking.
I like the rhetorical at the end...further allowing one to delve into deeper waters.
like i said before,
Enigmatic. |
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