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Rush
Contributed by
jyssvw22
on
Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 01:36:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
In the rush of our lives
Take a moment or two
As the scene slides by
Focus on a particular image
That you knew
A specific picture snapped
In the brainwave
In the synapse
At the speed of sight
The light speaks back
Self made echoes
Reverb then collapse
Transmitting a relapse
Overturning truths
Experienced facts
Denying the reality
Of a happening like that
In the rush of our lives
Take a breathe or two
As the scene slides by
You can only allow it to
____________
________
Copyright ©
jyssvw22
... [
2005-07-06 13:36:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Rush
(User Rating: 1 )
by Unbreakable on
Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 01:49:31 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very well written. I like the fact that there is no particular rhyme scheme but the rhyming you use fits in perfectly and everything works. Keep it up!
Krystal |
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Re: Rush
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 01:57:11 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Nice comparion jyss...I like this!
Scorp. |
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Re: Rush
(User Rating: 1 )
by boobiepeach on
Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 06:16:03 PM AEST
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a Message)
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briliantly done.
i liked this a lot, good rytham and good words.
peach |
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Re: Rush
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 10:09:18 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Another thought digging
write.
Your making me think here and I like it
very deep you have to read
each line at least three times
just to get it and even then
you might not . Simply yet complex
thinking very good job |
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Re: Rush
(User Rating: 1 )
by vibes2go on
Thursday, 4th August 2005 @ 05:50:49 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| my synapse's aren't doing what they ought .. but I liked this poem .. |
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