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Smoldering
Contributed by
NoSaint
on
Tuesday, 26th December 2006 @ 01:46:53 PM in AEST
Topic:
Suggestive
|
Smoldering in darkness
On the brink of ecstasy
Two lovers bodies entwined
Torrid madness running free
Night holds no boundaries
To what their bodies feel
Passion at its best
Exquisite pleasure for real
Under stars light now
They put on a spectacular show
As they twist and turn
Moving up, down, to and fro
With the arid night air
Release they find in unison
Knowing this exciting battle
They have for each other won
Copyright ©
NoSaint
... [
2006-12-26 13:46:53]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Re: Smoldering
(User Rating: 1 )
by on
Monday, 11th June 2007 @ 11:48:19 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| i like the way the poem runs, the rythm is definately there. However, it does feel as if some of those pretty words were in there just for the sake of it and that kills it somewhat for me. Don't be affraid to keep it simple. |
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Re: Re: Smoldering
(User Rating: 1 )
by on
Sunday, 14th September 2008 @ 07:21:52 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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The sweetness of love is universal.
How wonderful to see the words forming to the delights in a poem. |
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 Poem Rating
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Average Score: 1
Votes: 1
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